The Reformed Advisor

Why Christians Seeing 50 Shades of Grey Should Be Embarrassed (and Repent) – Part 2

Posted on February 19, 2015 in Marriage, Sexuality by

This cartoon seems appropriate to accompany my post Yesterday I posted part 1 of this commentary – it’s a good place to start.

Fight The New Drug is a group whose mission “is to use science, facts, and personal accounts to educate on the harmful effects of pornography and sexual exploitation.” This is a secular group, not a religious group that believes (correctly) that pornography in any form – including literature – is harmful. Here’s what they had to say about the movie:

“We know that books can most definitely be pornographic. Especially books like Fifty Shades of Grey that contain a high amount of highly explicit and graphic sexual content. 42% of male students and 20% of women said they regularly read romance novels, sexually explicit magazines, or regularly visited sexually explicit forums or chat rooms. Literature like Fifty Shades of Grey is referred to as erotica and can be just as addictive and as harmful in warping ideas about sex and intimacy as porn videos/images.”

Yet another non-religious voice decrying 50 Shades of grey while Christians eagerly line up to watch it. Anyone else see the problem with that?

Fight The New Drug has also compiled a list – along with an infographic you can see below – of the harmful views espoused in 50 Shades:

  1. If you’re good looking, rich, or successful, you can develop a violent sexual appetite and people will be okay with it. Christian Grey, the main character in the book, is an incredibly wealthy and good looking guy. He has a mansion, flies around in a helicopter, and is the heartthrob of all the women he meets. Now, something tells us that if the main character was a slimy, homeless, ex-convict with a scraggly beard and missing teeth, people wouldn’t find this story arousing at all, but see it for the gross and deviant story that it is. Why are people so accepting of this dark and disturbing story just because the male character is supposed to be attractive and desirable?
  2. Sex is completely for pleasure and all love/romance should be removed from the situation. In the story, Christian makes his women sign contracts that prevent them from ever speaking about what Christian does to them and gives him complete permission to do whatever he wants to them physically.
  3. Girls: If you hang around long enough and put up with a guy’s “issues”, eventually he might love you and change. [Anastasia] stays with [Christian] despite everything he does to her and becomes subject to his increasingly violent fantasies as he slowly guides her into accepting his disturbing behavior toward her. Fifty Shades of Greyteaches that girls are just helpless and fragile beings who will stick around for a man they find attractive. Would any of you girls stick around through all that?
  4. Guys: You can do whatever you want to a girl and she’ll just take it because… she’s a girl. Christian Grey is a womanizer and he uses his money and charm to keep Ana around and wanting to be with him. Despite the fact that he uses all sorts of disturbing methods to inflict pain on her for his own pleasure, nothing or no one stops him. Ana is still drawn to him and he is still drawn to her. He can do whatever he wants sexually to her and he knows that she will eventually be magnetized back to him.
  5. If you put a lot of highly explicit sexual material into a story, people will make it a best seller and it will even be turned into a big budget Hollywood film. Finally, we come back to the fact that this story was a best-selling novel that is now being turned into a big budget Hollywood film. This dark and twisted story is the reason that millions and millions of dollars have been made by the author, publishing company, and now all the people associated with the film. Pretty sucky to think that we live in a society where a story entirely about a sadistic and violent sexual relationship has become so wildly popular.

I would add to that last point that it’s “pretty sucky” that so many Christians are giving their money to help this sadistic story become a best-selling book and movie. That’s great stewardship.

Here’s some perspective for you, Christian woman, concerning this story and others like it. How would you feel if you walked into your house one evening to find your husband watching a movie like “Show Girls” or reading Playboy with a bunch of his buddies? Would you smile sweetly and say “good for you”? I’m gonna say no. I have a feeling there would be shouting, tears, flying objects, and men running for the doors. Why?

Simply put a wife wants to be the only woman her husband thinks about, fantasizes about, and dreams about. And if you don’t, you don’t have a very good understanding of intimacy, sex, and marriage. In the same way that you would not want your husband viewing pornography in any form, it is unthinkably hypocritical for you to support a book or movie like 50 Shades.

Let’s do a quick recap.

  1. Books and movies like 50 Shades are called erotica – a form of pornography.
  2. This particular form of porn celebrates BDSM and a form of sexuality that degrades women while seeking to own and control them.
  3. Viewing porn has been shown – for decades – to destroy intimacy and sexual satisfaction in a marriage.
  4. Wives would not want their husbands viewing porn in any form.
  5. Supporting this book and/or movie is equal to viewing and supporting porn.

Yep, it’s really that simple. So wife, Christian or not, if you plan to go see this movie I hope that when you get home you will joyfully download some porn for your husband (and son) to avoid being the world’s biggest hypocrite. More specifically, Christian woman, if you find yourself supporting this book/movie I hope you will study your Bible to learn what real intimacy, sexuality, and marriage is all about. Any professing Christian that believes Jesus celebrates this movie is sadly mistaken and lacking in basic biblical marriage doctrine.

Hey, here’s a thought. Rather than wasting time and money on sludge like 50 Shades, how about supporting a family-friendly film that teaches much needed biblical values like forgiveness and grace.

The movie “Old Fashioned” is also coming to a theater near you on Valentine’s Day. The writer and director of the film, Rik Swartzwelder, recently gave audiences a brief preview of the film, saying:

“‘Old Fashioned’ is an atypical story about relationship realities like forgiveness, isolation and community, getting beyond the past, healing — even about law and grace. At its core it’s about respect, honor, and virtue — outdated ideals, maybe — applied to romance in a modern world, which, of course, is hardly ‘normal’ by today’s dating standards.”

Sounds like a much better investment in time and relationships than any other movies coming out on Valentine’s Day.

50 Shades Info-Graphic

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