You may not have known that October is “Pastor Appreciation Month,” but that’s only because it wasn’t in the church bulletin or on the website. Even if it was announced from the pulpit last week in the service I am guessing you forgot by the time you walked out the door. Hey, no biggie.

All joking aside, this month is an opportunity to show your pastor that you truly appreciate him, his ministry, and his family. We have days to show our appreciation to teachers, public workers, and administrative professionals so I heartily endorse a month to show our spiritual shepherds that we appreciate their life of ministry.

You might be wondering why we need such a day. I mean, after all, doesn’t the pastor just work on Sunday’s? (And only for a couple of hours!) Why, if I had a job where I got to spend all day reading the Bible, studying, praying, and preaching life would be great. I’ll wait a minute while you get your head out of the sand before I go on.

Here’s the truth about being a pastor: it’s one of the toughest lives anyone has ever been called to. You spend years in school “preparing” but soon realize your college and seminary training is entirely inadequate. But it’s too late by the time you realize you need degrees in ministry, theology, counseling, psychology, education, leadership, business, finance, taxes, graphic design, IT, and anything related to kids if you are going to be successful.

On top of it all you have a “church” full of people that without ever going to seminary know how to do things better than you…all the time. Though you’ve spent years, decades perhaps, studying, there’s always that one guy that disagrees with every lesson or picks a single word to criticize. The deacons know better how to run the church. The treasurer has his own budget and refuses to share. The “hospitality committee” is composed of the meanest people in the church. The ushers take up the offering at the same time each week no matter what anyone says. And somehow the pastor is expected to “lead.”

But yeah, the pastor only “works” one day a week.

So what does the pastor do all day? Every pastor has been asked that question at least once. Some get asked once a week. But try explaining expository preaching to the average lay person, I dare you. So with such a “cushy” job why in the world does the pastor need a whole month of appreciation? (We gotta keep him humble you know!)

Let’s take a look at some statistics related to pastors to see if there is any reason whatsoever to warrant a time of appreciation.

The website PastorBurnout.com says: “Members of the clergy now suffer from obesity, hypertension and depression at rates higher than most Americans. In the last decade, their use of antidepressants has risen, while their life expectancy has fallen. Many would change jobs if they could.” (New York Times, August 2010)

The website goes on to share the following statistics:

• 23% have been fired or pressured to resign at least once in their careers.
• 25% don’t know where to turn when they have a family or personal conflict or issue.
• 33% felt burned out within their first five years of ministry.
• 33% say that being in ministry is an outright hazard to their family.
• 45% of pastors say that they’ve experienced depression or burnout to the extent that they needed to take a leave of absence from ministry.
• 50% feel unable to meet the needs of the job.
• 52% of pastors say they and their spouses believe that being in pastoral ministry is hazardous to their family’s well-being and health.
• 57% would leave the pastorate if they had somewhere else to go or some other vocation they could do.
• 70% don’t have any close friends.
• 75% report severe stress causing anguish, worry, bewilderment, anger, depression, fear, and alienation.
• 80% of pastors say they have insufficient time with their spouse.
• 90% feel unqualified or poorly prepared for ministry.
• 90% work more than 50 hours a week.
• 94% feel under pressure to have a perfect family.
• 1,500 pastors leave their ministries each month due to burnout, conflict, or moral failure.
• Doctors, lawyers and clergy have the most problems with drug abuse, alcoholism and suicide.

Oh come on! That’s just some random list of statistics compiled by pastors to try and make us all feel sorry for them. We all know they have a comfy, cushy job. I’m sure there’s at least one guy out there (probably the guy that argues at every lesson) saying that. Let’s take a look at another list to see if it confirms the previous list at all. The website PastoralCare.com has compiled a list with the help of the Fuller Institute, and George Barna of the Barna Research Group:

•  90% of the pastors report working between 55 to75 hours per week.

• 80% believe pastoral ministry has negatively affected their families. Many pastor’s children do not attend church now because of what the church has done to their parents.
• 33% state that being in the ministry is an outright hazard to their family.
• 90% feel they are inadequately trained to cope with the ministry demands.
• 80% of pastors and 84% of their spouses feel unqualified and discouraged as role of pastors.
• 50% feel unable to meet the demands of the job.
• 70% of pastors constantly fight depression.
• 70% say they have a lower self-image now than when they first started.
• 70% do not have someone they consider a close friend.
• 40% report serious conflict with a parishioner at least once a month.
• 50% of pastors feel so discouraged that they would leave the ministry if they could, but have no other way of making a living.
• 50% of the ministers starting out will not last 5 years.
• 1 out of every 10 ministers will actually retire as a minister in some form.
• 94% of clergy families feel the pressures of the pastor’s ministry.
• 80% of pastors’ spouses wish their spouse would choose a different profession.
• 4,000 new churches begin each year and 7,000 churches close.
• Over 1,700 pastors left the ministry every month last year.
• Over 1,300 pastors were terminated by the local church each month , many without cause.
• Over 3,500 people a day left the church last year.
• Many denominations report an “empty pulpit crisis”. They cannot find ministers willing to fill positions.

Suddenly the image is becoming clearer as we see that both lists are very similar. Two websites. Two lists. A lot of similarities.

The president of Lifeway and Southern Baptist blogger Thom Rainer shares some of the recurring reasons pastors leave ministry and burn out:

1. The 24/7 mentality. Many pastors can’t “turn off” work in their mind. Even on their days off, they are waiting for that next telephone call or next crisis. Thus, they never relax.
2. I often heard it said that conflict is not the problem; it’s how we handle conflict. That’s true to a point. But if church conflict and criticisms are ongoing, pastors wear down. They eventually burn out.
3. All pastors would be problem-free if they were omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent. Of course, no pastor can meet all the expectations of church members. But many try. And they burn out as a result.
4. Unwillingness to let go. Several years ago I was with a pastor who was frantically trying to sort the mail that had just arrived. He was hurrying to go to his next meeting. I asked him why he didn’t let someone else take care of some of things he was trying to do. His blank stare was his answer. He quit ministry three months later and never returned.
5. No friends.Many pastors fail to develop meaningful friendships, people with whom they can “let their hair down.” Without such outlets, burnout is more likely.
6. Not suited for some tasks.This issue is similar to trying to meet everyone’s expectations. First, such attempts are physically impossible. Second, pastors are not equipped to do everything well. But many try and many fail.
7. No life outside the church.I am amazed at the number of pastors who have no meaningful hobbies or recreational activities outside the church. I am less amazed when those pastors burn out and drop out.

And blogger (and pastor) Kevin DeYoung shares some encouraging words for the areas pastors feel most conflicted and burdened in this well-written post.

The point here is that pastors experience stress and spiritual battle in ways that no one else does. Satan knows full well that if he can “strike the shepherd,” that the sheep will all go running. Only the pastor (and his family) truly knows how difficult full-time vocational ministry is. Yes, there are times of extreme joy; particularly when someone breaks through those barriers and gets saved, or has some incredible life change occur. And yes, there are times of unspeakable joy; especially when God moves, the Holy Spirit works, and the church (people) is transformed. And certainly, times of blessing happen; like when the church serves the community and people are changed.

I don’t want anyone to think that being a pastor has no “mountains” because it does. I do want you to understand that for every mountain there is a valley, and often that valley is a spiritual war words can’t do justice. At these times our pastors need our prayers, they need to know we are supporting them and standing at the ready to help and serve. October, “Pastor Appreciation Month,” is an excellent time to remind your pastor that you love and appreciate him.

Here is 5 ways you can show your shepherd that you are blessed by his ministry:

1. Send a personal card or letter expressing your thanks to your pastor. Many pastors won’t admit it, but they keep a “secret file” of all the kind notes and letters they receive. When days are hard and they need encouragement they re-read them.
2. Provide free child-care so your pastor and his wife can have a night out. Pastors aren’t known for being the highest paid people in the land. Childcare and nights out are often a rare blessing. Volunteering to watch the kids so your pastor and his wife can go out and enjoy a kid-free night would brighten their day…and month.
3. Send a gift-card to your pastor’s favorite restaurant or coffee shop. Getting a night out is great. Getting a free dinner is amazing. Pastors don’t often “splurge” on dinner so this will be a special treat.
4. Invite your pastor (and his family) over for dinner. Many pastors feel isolated, and say they don’t have close friends. Being invited over for dinner connects your pastor and his family in a way that blesses them.
5. Buy a book from your pastor’s “book list.” Every pastor has a book list and it never ends. Just as he buys one book another three get added to the list. Buying books for your pastor helps him become a better pastor. The entire church benefits when the pastor reads, studies, and learns.

Those are just a few of the ways you can bless your pastor this month. But you can bless him all year by reminding him that you are praying for him, and love him. With a little creativity I am sure you can think of very special ways to show your pastor just how much you appreciate him. Don’t wait, do something today.

Look for another blog about “Pastor Appreciation Month” in which I will talk about how church structure and unrealistic expectations due to lack of understanding of what a biblical pastor is have contributed to the statistics above.